Thursday, November 19, 2009

THURSDAY BEAUTY PRODUCT(S) OF THE WEEK


Girls! Put your face on!
I have been an avid user of the bedhead make up line for the past 2 years. I really like their coverage and it hasn’t been really heavy like some of the other lines. But I may be switching very shortly to another line.

Dermablend. Ever heard of it?? You really have to see it in person to understand the power of this product. I have never seen such flawless skin in my entire life. Ever. And I’m betting that I’ll be fan as soon as I buy it, how can you go wrong with a water-proof, smudge-proof, 30 SPF foundation?? You can’t. I dare you to try.



For that perfect lip addicted girl.
Revlon’s colorstay overtime lipstick is amazing. It stays and stays. I have seen it last from breakfast to hangover! Give it a go ladies.
p.s. I hear the color “on going flame” is a must for you pin-up beauties.






Fashion Trend:

Singing the blues….but in a good way.

It’s the hot new color for fall…midnight blue. It’s a little mysterious…and a lot sexy. So if you’re going to do it up right…add some of this to your wardrobe!



Find this cute little owl at Forever 21 for under $5


OPI's Russian Navy......do it.



Another Forever 21 find...and under $40
Until next week my little fashionistas...
MFJ



Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Hump Day!!!

Hump Day Advice


Its everybody’s favorite day of the week. Wednesday…Hump Day…I got an email from a loyal reader that wanted me to discuss the fine art of flirting…so here you go!!!!

Flirting 101

There’s an easy way to remember how to flirt and flirt well ladies. I call it the “MECCA” effect. If you can remember MECCA, you’re golden.

M – is for Mysterious. Once you’ve done your business and flirted with that hot boy there’s no reason to seal the deal just yet. Leave him wanting a little more. It will drive them crazy. End the conversation or date just a tad bit sooner and he’ll be thinking of it for the rest of the night.

E- is for Eyes. Make sure you make some serious eye contact with your victim…er man slave…er person you’re flirting with. It can feel intense or even awkward at first, but he’ll know you’re into him when you don’t look away right away and sometimes getting caught looking it what starts the whole process.

C-is for Confidence. What’s that old saying? “FAKE IT ‘TIL YOU MAKE IT” so true. Even if you are unsure or unconfident of your looks or your sexiness, just pretend you aren’t and soon enough with lots of practice you won’t be. Men like a confident woman. But watch that you don’t over do it and become cocky…most men don’t want a woman who they think is going to be bossy, clingy or needy, so try to balance it out.

C- second “c” is for Communication. Even if its something stupid, try to make the effort to talk to the guy. Ask him for the time, directions or compliment his shoes. It doesn’t really matter how you start it, it just needs to happen.

And

A – is for Appearance. Try to make an effort to look your best everyday. You never know who you’re going to run into and besides feeling pretty will definitely boost that confidence level. Sometimes you have to feel sexy to look sexy.


**Hope that helps! J


And now on to the moment you’ve all been waiting for….the crème de la crème…





MFJ's Doucher of the Week

Panty Raid

So, Miss Dandridge emailed in a copy of some text messages that occurred between her and her part-time lover Leon the Ladies Man. What transpired was shocking and sad and a little creepy all at the same time. I think we should take up a collection and get this woman some new bloomers. See below loyal readers.

Leon: I tried your panties on the other day, cut off the circulation to my left nut…

Miss Dandridge: LMMFAO!!!!! I just spit water all over my bed.

LLM: lol I’m sorry J

MD: You’re a fucking mess, I have to use my inhaler now…

LLM: lol don’t get drowndeded….

MD: I haven’t laughed that hard in a long time, Ur funny. I the mental image of you trying to wear my panties is just 2 much!!!!

LLM: I’m just goofy…I’m sorry you wet your bed J

MD: It’s a big ass bed. I’ll just roll my ass over to the other side

LLM: lol word…pimpin pimpi big bed J

MD: I was texting you 2 remind u about the random panties left in ur room so u wouldn’t have to explain 2 anybody.

LLM: lol oh, you think I forgot?

LLM: and I have no one to explain anything to…

LLM: J

MD: lol yeah and stuff like that doesn’t usually happen to me, so I don’t know the etiquette is

MD: in the event that you did, I wouldn’t want u 2 look like ass w/some other woman’s cottony goodness left behind.

LLM: I knew they were there. I sniff them e’rry night!!! Lol they are in good hands, you don’t have to worry. J

MD: shut up.

LLM: I’m playin’ I don’t sniff them

MD: you’re a mess


**and that was it…he fell off the face of the earth, panties in hand. I think he tried them on, stretched them out and is now too embarrassed to give them back….well I say give ‘em back you panty thief!!!!!!


Until next week, I bit you ado






Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Tuesday Night Finance


Tuesday Night Finances

Welcome to another installment of MFJ’s Financial Guidance. I know when I hear the words “mutual funds” or “stock options,” my brain automatically shuts down. I start to picture unicorns and half priced designer shoes and sweet sweet black patent leather. My little girl brain just will have no space for anything logical or financial. *sigh* So for anyone who is a little (or a lot) like me, this is your redhead-proof guide to mutual funds. Hooray.

WHAT THE HELL IS A MUTUAL FUND?
Good question. A mutual fund is a collection of money used to invest in a bigger operation. That operation could be a stock, bonds, short-term money market or other “securities.” Then at the end of the year the investors are distributed the net proceeds or losses.

WHY SHOULD I INVENST IN A MUTUAL FUND?
Its an easy was to invest and make money without having to do a lot of work yourself or put up a lot of cash to start. However, you need to be wary of additional fees that are included when you start investing in mutual funds. Some of those fees may be: Management Fees, Non-management fees, 12b-1/Non-12b-1 service fees, Investor fees and expenses, and Brokerage commissions. *The common rule of thumb when deciding whether or not you need a mutual fund manager is that unless your fund is making over 2% on every 10,000 you have invested, you’re paying your manager too much for something you could be doing on your own.

TYPES OF MUTUAL FUNDS

Open Ended- which means that the fund does not have limitations on how many investors there can be. They will also buy back share from investors who want to sell.

Exchange-Traded Funds- the ETfs combine the characteristics of both a mutual fund and a closed –end fund. They are traded daily on the stock-exchange and are usually sold to investors in large blocks (usually 50,000) and tend to have lower expenses than the traditional closed-end fund.

Equity Fund – are the most common of the mutual funds and consist mostly of stock investments. These are also known as stock funds and essentially exist to have a long term growth through capital gains.

Bond Funds – these mutual funds have a set time before they mature. They usually have a lower return than other mutual funds, but they also have a lower risk and have tax advantages. There are also high yield bonds that have the potential to make more money than a regular bond, but also have a higher risk.

Money Market Funds – MMFs have the lowest amount of risk to invest in are required by the government to only invest in low-risk securities.

Hedge Funds – are a private higher risk investment usually limited to a certain number of people and investors are required to keep their money in the account for at least a year (making Hedge Funds illiquid).

WANNA SOUND SMART???

Know these terms.

Net Asset Value: At the end of the trading day each fund’s value is determined, less the fund’s liabilities and are then expressed in a “per-share” amount…that’s the Net Asset Value.

Average Annual Return:
There’s a formula ladies for finding out the average annual return on your fund. And its pretty easy even if you’re not a math genius (such as myself).

P(1+T)ⁿ= ERV

Wherein:
P= a hypothetical initial payment of $1,000
T = average annual total return
n= number of years

ERV = ending redeemable value of a hypothetical $1,000 payment made at the beginning of a 1-,5-, or 10- year period.

Tell that to a stockbroker and he’ll think he’s met the woman of his dreams. Haha

OTHER TIPS/ADVICE
When deciding on a particular fund ask to see these items:

The Prospectus
The Statement of Additional Information
The Annual Report





Check out these websites for further advice

Monday, November 16, 2009

Monday Night Meals: Spinach Strawberry Salad


Tonight's meal comes to us from my friend John B. Although I don't think he's actually tried this salad, it does sound delicious. So go ahead and give it a go.

Ingredients: 
5 cups spinach leaves
2 cups strawberries (sliced)
1 cup candied pecans
6 oz. crumbled goat cheese
1/2 cup light raspberry vinaigrette

gently mix and serve  immediately.  

Friday, November 13, 2009

Friday Night Reels & Saturday Morning Crafting



Sorry guys, I've been a little under the weather today, so I'm doing double duty...First up
Friday Night Reels



I'm not ashamed to admit it, I'll be waiting in line with every other 12 year old girl to see this movie. Even if it sucks...it will be great. How can you deny yourself a little Edward. I know I can't.




Saturday Morning Crafts

This one's pretty easy. I had some old photos lying around that I wanted to do something with. I also had a wicker end table that was in terrible need of having its top painted.



So I took some modge podge and aligned the pictures to the way I wanted them and glued them down. You could also just cover the pictures with a piece of glass instead of gluing the photos down so you can change them out. Here's the end result. It looks cute and I did it in under an hour. Hooray for me.


Thursday, November 12, 2009

Thursday Fashion...



Fashion Thursday…Equestrian Meets Pretty Woman

High fashion alludes me. Honestly. Dolce and Gabana’s 2010 spring ready to wear looks are just baffling. I don’t know, maybe its what all the high paid bull-fighting prostitutes are wearing this season.






Beauty Product of the Week


Blemish Clearing Serum An antiseptic, anti-inflammatory treatment serum to detoxify the skin, heal, and prevent blemishes. Antioxidant vitamins A, C, and E help protect the skin from scarring and free radical damage. Can be used as a spot treatment or thinly layered on entire face.What it is formulated WITHOUT:- Parabens- Sulfates- Synthetic Fragrances- Synthetic Dyes- Petro-Chemicals- Phthalates


Jewelry Accessory of the Week


Designed by Udi Behr inspired by the hit show true blood…I’m putting this on my Christmas list…STAT

Here’s the website: http://truebloodjewelry.com/index.asp



Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Wednesday Hump Day


Welcome to the new adventures of Romeo and that other Girl...
First Up...

LIAR LIAR PANTS ON FIRE
Let's call our 2 players Cathy and Jake. Here's the background to the relationship. Cathy and Jake have been dating for a couple of months and although things are great and merry and the sex is spectacular, Jake keeps doing something that is driving Cathy a little batty...LYING. Oh, we have all been there and have even been the culprit at times. It seems as though Jake likes to partake a little too much at social gatherings and then he lies about it...Naughty Jake. Cathy has told him on a couple of occasions that this particular "partaking" upsets her and when he lies about it, it only makes Cathy feel worse. Cathy is unsure what to do, which is why she's come to the Mutha Flippin' Jules (MFJ hereafter). Well Cathy...here goes.
I have determined that he lies about his actions based on two reasons.
(A)
He has a serious problem that he's either in denial about or doesn't want you to know about. Though my gut is when people don't want you to know something they usually are a little better about hiding the behavior. if he has a problem chances are that no matter how many times you tell him it bothers you or hurts your feelings the "need for speed" as it were, is gong to trump your emotions every time. Try to be supportive in finding him some help.
**Okay, that was the worst case scenario.

(B)
He knows how you feel (because you have told him more than once). But continues to do it and lie about it because he's feeling controlled. Absent an actual addiction, do you really want to be with someone who would risk a good real relationship for something so trivial??? Could be a deal breaker.




HERE'S THE MEN'S QUESTION OF THE WEEK

Dear MFJ,
Why do women like to have their necks kissed and or bitten??

- Gerardo



Well, Big G, 3 words.
It feels good. We see it movies and read it in Romance Novels (or female porn). HA. So when it happens in real life we go coo-coo for it.


AND LASTLY,
The Doucher of the Week Winner

This weeks story comes from the other side of the nation. Thanks to Jenny is PA for this one. When Jenny started dating Bill I wonder if she knew what a complete doucher he is.Shortly into the relationship, Jenny's period was late...uh-oh...She calls Bill to tell him the bad news but explains that she is sure its a false alarm (she had been mixing antibiotics with birth control, which as we know...is never good). A couple of days later a money order shows up at her door from Bill asking her to "take care" of the problem. Bill then proceeds to drop off the face of the planet. Way to jump the gun, Bill. Jenny was in fact not PG, but decided it was in her best interest to keep the $200 from Douchy-McDouchenstein. He did call some months later to see if the "problem" had been taken care of. Jenny lied and told him she had taken care of it. I hope you bought yourself something nice, Jenny. Something to ease your pain and suffering. :) and that's why you Bill are the MFJ Doucher of the Week!!!!!

Congratulations you dirty rat.

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Its Tuesday...you know what that means...


Let's talk finance. I don't know about you all, but it seems to me like there is never enough money to go around. I can count on one hand the number of people I know who are financially stable. For those of you who are (or who claim to be)...this is not for you. ha. For the rest of us poor souls (literally), I'm going to show you how to make an easy budget and find the tools to actually stick with it. 
1. Here's the hardest step...for the next week, track your spending...on EVERYTHING. This could get difficult and ugly if you're like me and don't actually "balance" your checkbook. That's what online banking is for right??? Well try. There's a really cool site called MINT, that can help you with this...It links to your own banking institution and tracks your spending for you.  
2. After your week of tracking you might have to start deciding what things you can/can't live without. Starbucks, Sephoria and Urban Outfitters might have to take a vacation for a while if you want to start saving money. 
3. Next you'll need to decide how you want to budget your money...be it monthy or bi-weekly. Since most of us get paid on a bi-weekly schedule, its suggested to start that way. 
4. Your budget will most likely be in 3 categories; Net Income, Non-Discretionary Expenses, and Discretionary Expenses. The ND's are things like rent/mortgage, utility bills and depts that you pay every month (or bi-weekly) the D's are things like: eating out, movies, pocket money or "Flow" and the likes. 
5. Now break out your calculator and subtract the ND's and D's from your net income...are you in the red or in the black??
If you've got money left over you're doing better than you thought and your financial planners will tell you that those monies left over should be going into 1 of 2 categories: savings or investment or debt repayment options. (Not a new pair of shoes unfortunately.) 
If you find yourself in the red, fret not. Maybe you're being too generous with your estimated expenses and you can revise those as you see fit. If after you've review the numbers and you're still in the red, its time to get real with yourself. You're living far beyond your means and you're going to have to tighten your belt if you want to save money. You may even have to go without the things you have come accustomed to living with like, cable or Netflix...but please don't go without food or anything that essential to your survival. 
Once you have come up with a budget plan, stick with it. If you are more conscious about your spending you will find it easier to save money or not spend it on frivolous things you don't need. MINT can also help you not to fall into old spending habits by giving you a graph chart of your spending as the months go on. Give it a shot...it could help. :) 
BTW...there are tons of online forums and sites dedicated to helping you build your budget. Some are free and some require payment. Try the free ones first. You can also download a budget template from excel if you're a microsoft user. 

Monday, November 9, 2009

Monday Night Meals...numero uno


Alright folks here's your recipe for Monday, November 9, 2009. I call it Stiletto Chicken and Pasta. This was so simple to make, it almost made itself. 
Ingredients: 
2 whole boneless chicken breasts
1 jar of pre-made 3 pepper tomato sauce (you can find this at my favorite market...The Sunflower Market
Dehydrated Spinach Linguini 
In a skillet put a cap full of cooking oil of your choice...I enjoy Olive Oil. 
Place the chicken in the skillet and sprinkle stir fry seasoning or lemon pepper on the raw chicken. 
Make sure its cooked all the way through. 
Meanwhile...boil the linguini, drain, put back in the pot and add the sauce. 
When the chicken is done, transfer to a plate and cut up into chunks. 
Add to the sauce and noodles.
Simmer for 15 minutes or so. 
Top off with some parmesan cheese or lemon wedges and enjoy. :) 
Looking for a simple dessert???
Buy the easiest prepackaged sugar cookie mix...follow those directions...
Then in a mixing bowl add Orange Marmalade Jelly and Powdered sugar and mix until creamy. Frost the cookies when they have cooled and you have one delicious after dinner treat. 

welcome to the new and improved "in the background"

My blog has been reformatted to present an actual purpose to my readers. I'm gearing this site more for the late-20's female on-the-go crowd, but anyone is welcome to read, comment and the like. So here's how it will roll from now on...if you have suggestions or topics you would like me to discuss please email me at: askmuthaflippinjules@gmail.com or simply comment. :) 

Mondays: Monday Night Meals
Every Monday I'll post a new "easy" meal that can be made in under an hour. If you're lucky you'll get a dessert out of me as well.

Tuesdays: "For Reals??"
I'll provide you with financial planning and budgeting tools, and I'll try not to bore you to death, though I make no promises.

Wednesdays: Hump Day Assets 
Relationship/Sex Advice from yours truly ...or interesting or funny things that appeal to this topic.

Thursdays: Heels
Latest fashion/beauty/hair tips, tricks and trends.

Fridays: "Reels" 
New movie previews and critic reviews.

Saturdays: Craft-Day
Ideas for making gifts or new decorating trends

Sunday: Weekly Catch-Up
You'll get to find out what's going on with me in my world. I know you all look forward to that!!!

So 3 cheers for some much needed structure on the blog.  :) 

Sunday, November 8, 2009

wow that was fast...


Its almost ten o'clock on Sunday night and I'm sitting here thinking, sheesh, where did the weekend go?? I didn't think I was all that busy, but I guess so. Friday night Tommy and I checked out First Friday in Phoenix...I hadn't been in a while and I was glad we went, even if it was a very condensed version of what the art walk used to be. There were a lot of really cool exhibits out (if you get a chance to see Jesse Pepper please do). And true to First Friday Tradition, I got a new pair of earrings. :) What can I say, I'm spoiled. Saturday night was my 10 year high school reunion, which I did not go to, but I got together with some old High School friends and we had our own little gathering. I'm not sad I missed the actual reunion, but it would have been funny to see where everyone is now. Maybe the 20 year reunion I'll go to...But I doubt it. This morning we had breakfast with Miss Ross, the hot mama diva, which is always a good time. I love her. And I'm going to steal her shirt. Its Max from Where the Wild Things Are....and its at Urban Outfitters...check it out. I found the cutest fabric for my wingback chair BTW and I took the measurements for the reupholstering project that is in the works...I also typed up my recipe to send to my favorite blogger, so keep your fingers crossed that she will find in her heart to post it!!! 
Also, thanks to everyone who was extra-special nice to me on what is usually a really hard day for me. I can't believe its been 9 years since my mom died, time really does fly. But, all in all it was a really good day...and the Saints remain 8-0...just in case you were wondering. 

Thursday, November 5, 2009

One More Thing...

My "PRO" blog needs a name...so comment and tell me what you think my blog should be named...


p.s. Julie(themostbeautifulgirlintheworld).com is already taken..I know right...bastards.

I'm going Pro...or at least I want to.


I am toying with the idea of taking my blog "pro," which means I want to make money doing it. I would like to say that the reason for this is to share my infinite wisdom of random/stupid/ridiculousness things with the world, but no. Its money...to quote the awesome ABBA "its a rich man's world" and I want to be in that world. :) hahaha...so comment and tell me what you think about this venture.


p.s. you can comment on the actual blog, you don't have to reply to the email notification. That way everyone can see your comments and then maybe the comment section wouldn't be so lonely.


p.s.s. I emailed my favorite blogger to ask if I could "guest spot" on one of her cooking blogs....so we'll see if I get a response there. That would be awesome for me and my little baby blog.

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Where it all started


The Background lyricsEverything is quiet since you're not around And I live in the numbness now In the background I do the things we did before I walk Haight Street to the store And they say where's that crazy girl You don't get drunk on red wine and fight no more I don't see you anymore since the hospital The plans I make still have you in them Cause you come swimming into view And I'm hanging on your words Like I always used to do The words they use so lightly I only feel for you I only know because I carry you around In the background I'm in the background Words they come and memories all repeat I lift your head while they change the hospital sheets And I would never lie to you no I would never lie to you no I felt you long after we were through, we were through The plans I make still have you in them Cause you come swimming into view And I'm hanging on your words Like I always used to do The words they use so lightly I only feel for you I only know because I carry you around In the background Cause I felt you long after we were through Well you come swimming into view And I'm hanging on your words Like I always used to do The words they use so lightly I only feel to you I only know because I'm way I'm way in the background I'm in the background


Cheesy...maybe...but I love this song.